Sometimes I pine for home...

I didn't take this picture, but it looks very much like where I grew up. Now, living in Florida, I yearn for places like this. I live here in perpetual sprawl, where nothing is quite city or quite suburbs or quite country. I have to drive a long way to get out of the atmosphere we live in, and even then I wouldn't come across beautiful rolling hills like these unless I actually left the state. So funny that sometimes we leave home searching and return there to find exactly what it was we were looking for. Problem is, I can't just go back there now, because I have a whole life set up here. I have a great life, no complaints about that. It's just that my heart sometimes yearns for places like in this picture and it hurts so badly I feel the pain physically, like a blade in the side. Also, in my travels I've found that no matter how beautiful the place, no matter how nice the weather, no matter what new and groovy things there are to do, I still miss my family. I've never found people on whom I can depend as I can depend upon them. And, on a recent trip back home I discovered that my sister in law is like a twin separated from me at birth. We are so much alike it's eerie, although not surprising, since the brother she is married to is like the other half of my soul. Not being close to him in proximity is like having a part of my soul in another part of the country. It's not like I live in a horrible place, but I have a sense of disconnection all the time that I've never been able to quite shake. I have to constantly look at the good side of things and focus on my blessings always, and keep close to my Irish heritage, where I feel my roots. When I don't know what else I am, I know that I'm Irish. I know that I come from strong, courageous people who came to this country not knowing what they were getting into, filled with sorrow for having to leave a home they would most likely never see again. If they could do that, then I can survive another day in Florida!!!
I took this from Victorious Spirit's weblog. It's very cool. Check out her Johari window (I think you have to get it from her blog) and mine here: http://kevan.org/johari?name=Starfairie and make your own as well!!!!
Slàinte!!!
ps-If Blogger had actually uploaded my picture you would have seen a beautiful scene of rollings hills, autumn trees and New England homes. Blogger is NOT being friendly to me tonight.