A Goodbye to a Friend

Yesterday was a little bit of a sad day for me, but also a little bit of a happy day. I really saw just how much our memory lives on through the good deeds we've done, and through those things which we've left behind that can continue to help inspire and heal other people. I've met many people through my journey of recovery; some have been deeply caring, sensitive, real people and some, well, no so much. Amy "Turner" Tunick falls into the first category. She was one of those people whose very presence made you feel happy. She wrote a weekly peice called "The Feel Good" column for the Sun Times here in South Florida; I used to grab the paper just to read her column; often that's all I would read in the paper, since I rarely have time these days to read a paper from cover to cover! Her column focused on positivity and hope, even throughout her fight with pancreatic cancer.

Yesterday my family and I attended a book signing for Feeling Good-Even Through Cancer which Amy was working on and which was released postumously. Her Mom and best friend were there to sign the book, and the event was attended by her friends and family, and anyone else whose lives were touched by this wonderful woman who wished to come by, buy her book and socialize a bit. I was only able to read a few passages while I was at the event. When I first picked it up and saw her picture and began reading I couldn't hold back the tears. I knew Amy before she got sick; I'd talked with her a little bit about her hopes and dreams for the future, and I felt heartbroken that some of those dreams (ones that came true for me) could not be realized for her. She was such a sweet, talented, kind person that it's still difficult for me to believe that she is no longer on this side of the veil between the worlds. After I got home, however, I thought about all of the amazing things she had accomplished in her life. She moved to LA as a young woman to pursue a career in acting and was involved in the show biz industry for many years. She loved animals and supported at least two causes for dogs that I know about. She wrote her column every week, a writing that touched so many people. She was a vegetarian. She championed for pancreatic cancer research when she got sick; she didn't just lay down and accept the prognosis that was given to her (many pancreatic cancer patients don't live past three to five months), instead facing her illness head on and doing everything within her power to beat it. She tried to remain optomistic and retained her sense of humor, even when the going got rough. Even when the outcome seemed to be turning bleak. I believe it was this inner strength and determination, and her attitude of positivity and hopefulness and action, as well as having a good spiritual base, having some phenomenal doctors and the prayers offered by many friends and family members, which enabled her to live for 32 months, much longer than her doctors probably originally thought she would.

Amy inspires me. I awoke this morning with a sense of gratitude such that I have not had for quite some time. I feel able to go forward and follow my own dreams, I feel that they are possible because I see what she accomplished in her life; I see how she never gave up hope, never stopped trying. I see how little time we all really have in this world and how precious that time is.

Sometimes, though, it's still hard to believe that she is gone from us. I guess, in some sense, she isn't gone from us, at least not one hundred percent. She is still here, cheering us on, leaving us her legacy of kindness, optimism, humor, and hope. Thanks, Amy.