Hi!

I've been very bad about keeping up here. =( Life has been hectic, and with moving going on this weekend (yay!!!!) life is even more hectic! It's great though; I'm happy that we're moving, that we were able to finance a home that is much nicer than what we'd initially thought we'd be able to buy, that our daughter will have a yard, a dog and some friends her age next door. The Goddess is really working in our lives and for that (and so many other things) I'm grateful.

Here's a link, if you feel like popping over: http://suburbangreenwitch.blogspot.com/

I'll try to be a little better about posting; time is always in short supply around here!

A Day at the Beach

My family and I enjoyed a wonderful day today, celebrating the marriage of some good friends, splashing around in the ocean, running around on the beach, and just celebrating the sunshine and cool breezes. Thunderstorms had been predicted for later in the day, but although we saw some very large dark clouds, the rains never moved in. I hope that the skies decide to open up tomorrow, however, as everything is very dry and we are in desperate need of some quenching. Days like this make me happy that I live in Florida; my relatives up north are cold, tired of the snow, and eager for spring to make her annual appearance. While I miss New England and miss being close in proximity to my family, I've grown accustomed to living here, and it doesn't look like we'll be leaving any time soon.

On that note, the new house closing date in this Tuesday. I hope, hope, hope that this time it "takes". Hubby and I are anxious to begin the tasks of cleaning, installing appliances and laying down new tiles in the living room (more on that later). Once we've closed and the termite tenting has been done, I will do the same blessing over the house that I did when we moved into our current residence. It seemed to have worked nicely and it made our house feel "clearer". Plus, I love doing that first little majical thing in a home. It's the beginning of making it our own, of giving it that first glimmer of a sparkle. I burned down the last of my house candle a few weeks ago; now it's up to the bank to let us close (and the universe to decide what's going to happen).

I hope everyone had a good weekend. Until next time, Goddess bless!!!

Long Time No Write

I haven't logged in here for quite awhile. I've been posting at MySpace, began a book and have been busy being a Mom and trying to close on a new house. This has involved fun things like going to look at tile for the living room floor, searching for new appliances, planning various decorating projects, and fantasizing about how our magical gardens are going to look. It has also involved reams of paperwork and lots of questions and frustrations. Buying a house ain't what it used to be. One must prove, prove again, and prove yet some more that his finances are sound and that she doesn't have any deep, dark secrets which might lead to financial difficulties down the road. Time and again we've had closing dates promised, only to be told later that we could not close due to further documentation we need to submit or issues the seller needs to take care of. N and I are eager to get into the house, as much cleaning and painting must be done and we will have to pull up the old living room tile and install new before we can move any furniture into said area.

In addition to our possible move, I'd been plagued by a nagging feeling over the past month or so that something was not right with my family up north. Each time I'd ask my Ma about it she'd insist that nothing was amiss, but my fears were recently confirmed. The issue isn't something that can't be resolved, but it is a scary issue and one that I am frightened by due to my familiarity with it. I am hoping that I can be of assistance to my family in what will hopefully become a time of positive growth and am glad that I have my own life together enough these days to be of any use at all. I am relieved to finally be aware of the situation, since when I have these feelings they almost always prove to be valid (such as my asking N if he'd heard from a friend of ours last week who then called him a couple of days later). I have not progressed to the level where I can discern what is actually going on, however, and this can be very frustrating.

There isn't much going on with us today. N is sleeping, my little on is watching cartoons, and I'm about to get off the computer and scoop her up to do something a bit more constructive. We are going to meet some friends a little later in the day, but I'm not envisioning a highly active night as N has taken a bit headachey again after a bout last night with a criminal carnival jockey at a local church fair. I cannot believe they allow such snake oil salesmen to work carnivals aimed at making money for the church. Games are one thing (and we all know that carnival games are always a bit shady-we expect it) but this was over the top. What this man is doing should be illegal. That's okay. I know that my guardian spirits are hard at work, and for sure this guy is earning himself some bad energy in the extreme.

Hopes,,, and Gripes

Tuesday I deliberately did not make any plans because I wanted to watch the inauguration. Happy that Barack Obama was elected in the first place, and even happier that finally our country might begin to see some positive changes (albeit at a snail's pace-there is so much work to be done to pull us out of the economic mire that we are now stuck in), I was eager to bear witness to the momentous event of our country's first bi-racial man being sworn into office. Watching this event gave me some hope-hope not only that our country can once again rise to prosperity (for everyone, not just the priviledged few), but also that maybe, just maybe, with a President in office who is able to see a larger view of the world, that we also will learn to do so. While race relations in our nation are much better than they were ten, twenty, or thirty years ago, we still have much room for improvement. Some of the comments I heard during the Presidential campaign were simply ugly; in my naivete I'd thought that most people had outgrown that sort of ignorance. Thankfully, this stale, old prejudicial attitude was not the norm. Obviously, we've grown as a country and as a collective people, because Senator Obama is now President Obama, and the eyes crying with joy during the inauguration ceremony belonged to people of all color, nationality, and religion (I can't verify the religion part, but I'm sure it's true). I love that now little kids of all ethnicities can dream of greatness with hope in their hearts.

As far as my gripes today, they aren't really that important. Hubby and I are dealing with the world of mortgage loans and real estate agents and it's been an interesting and busy four months. We still aren't sure if we will be able to buy the home we've been hoping to purchase; first it seemed as though the loan would go through, but now we're not sure. The banks seem to change their minds like the weather changes in New England, and we are existing in a sort of limbo, not sure if we can begin to pack or if we should sign another year's lease. It's frustrating, but it's just something we need to keep plodding through. We'll have an answer soon enough, and if it's meant to be that we buy this place, then we'll be living there in a couple of months. Time will tell; all we can do is put forth the effort and hope for the best!

Hopes... and Gripes

Tuesday I deliberately did not make any plans because I wanted to watch the inauguration. Happy that Barack Obama was elected in the first place, and even happier that finally our country might begin to see some positive changes (albeit at a snail's pace-there is so much work to be done to pull us out of the economic mire that we are now stuck in), I was eager to bear witness to the momentous event of our country's first bi-racial man being sworn into office. Watching this event gave me some hope-hope not only that our country can once again rise to prosperity (for everyone, not just the priviledged few), but also that maybe, just maybe, with a President in office who is able to see a larger view of the world, that we also will learn to do so. While race relations in our nation are much better than they were ten, twenty, or thirty years ago, we still have much room for improvement. Some of the comments I heard during the Presidential campaign were simply ugly; in my naivete I'd thought that most people had outgrown that sort of ignorance. Thankfully, this stale, old prejudicial attitude was not the norm. Obviously, we've grown as a country and as a collective people, because Senator Obama is now President Obama, and the eyes crying with joy during the inauguration ceremony belonged to people of all color, nationality, and religion (I can't verify the religion part, but I'm sure it's true). I love that now little kids of all ethnicities can dream of greatness with hope in their hearts.

As far as my gripes today, they aren't really that important. Hubby and I are dealing with the world of mortgage loans and real estate agents and it's been an interesting and busy four months. We still aren't sure if we will be able to buy the home we've been hoping to purchase; first it seemed as though the loan would go through, but now we're not sure. The banks seem to change their minds like the weather changes in New England, and we are existing in a sort of limbo, not sure if we can begin to pack or if we should sign another year's lease. It's frustrating, but it's just something we need to keep plodding through. We'll have an answer soon enough, and if it's meant to be that we buy this place, then we'll be living there in a couple of months. Time will tell; all we can do is put forth the effort and hope for the best!

Gumbo Limbo Nature Center Trip

We were out the door early this morning for our homeschool group's trip to Gumbo Limbo Nature Center in Boca Raton. The trip turned out to be a blast; the woman who did the tour was patient, thorough, and very cool, there was lots to see, and the weather was good for the occasion (slightly overcast, breezy, warm but not hot). After a walk through the hammock during which we were treated to all sorts of trees, insects, spiders, cool breezes, and a view from the wooden observatory out toward the ocean (which is across the street from the park), we stopped by the park's three separate tanks. In the tanks we saw turtles, sharks, sea urchins, starfish, and various fish, such as barracuda and pufferfish. The kids had fun looking over the side of the tank; at one point the baby turtle above swam over and poked her head out of the water as if asking to be fed. The park is very involved in helping to rebuild and protect the sea turtle population.

I took several pictures, some of which turned out better than this one, but my computer was having issues while I was attempting to upload them and so the battery on the camera died before I was able to accomplish even half of this task. I will need to do this later-so disappointing as I was hoping to view the pictures after I arrived home. We are an immediate gratification oriented society these days; sometimes I fall prey to this affliction as well! Who am I kidding? I fall prey to it every day. I think that sometimes I hear G-d laughing. In fact, I heard Him just a few minutes ago when I was trying to copy the pictures onto my computer.... Of course, I don't mean this in a literal sense. That would mean that I'm even crazier than I think I am.

Anyway.... after the tour we all had lunch together at a nearby playground. This was probably the biggest playground I have ever been to. The kids had fun running around inside this mazelike wooden structure; there are all sorts of clever gadgets and bright pictures at various points, and a sand play area nearby.

Now I'm tired and looking forward to an easy dinner, giving my little one a bath, and lying down in bed with a book. Happy Tuesday night, everyone!

Mommyhood

One thing I've come to realize about being a parent is that it drives us to heights we never thought possible. Really. In spite of the stress, the hyper-scheduling (my own Mom's term), the constant demands on our own time, the always having to put your own needs secondary to the needs of your child (which doesn't mean that you own needs can never be met, just that they sometimes will not be met according to your desired time schedule), the incessant tiredness (going to the gym helps a lot with this issue), being a mother has helped me to realize that I can achieve goals, spiritual and physical that I never thought possible. Part of the reason for this is that, as a parent, I want to set a good example of the best path to take toward happiness and well being. It's not enough for me to tell my child what I think she should do (what is ethically correct, etc.); I need to live my words. Children see straight through plain talk; in order for them to believe us enough to possibly try out our recommendations, they need to see us putting our words into action in our own lives.

I've realized lately that the only way for me to achieve nearly all of my goals on any given day, I've got to attack the day with the ferocity of a mother lion. I can't spend much, or any time, sitting on the sidelines reading a magazine (although a well planned day might yield downtime around nightfall), surfing the web (I have to do this early in the morning or late at night), or engaging in any other of the seemingly thousands of activities which try to draw my attention away from my daily goals. I have a very short attention span and need to be kept busy almost all of the time. Also, in spite of the fact that many of my friends seem to think that I'm a laid back person, deep within me there is a hyperactive maniac whose mind must be occupied at all times lest I fall into the depths of deep depression. Thankfully, these days my mind is nearly always busy, along with my hands (who also enjoy near constant activity). This character trait can be a double edged sword; I'm easily distracted but have found that I can gently guide my thoughts back to the needs at hand. In fact, if I sometimes go against the unproductive routines in my life, the comfortable but non-functional habits, I find that I am ultimately much happier because my daughter and my husband are happier, my home is running along a much smoother flow, I feel more spiritually fulfilled (it's sometimes hard to make myself go to synagogue on Friday night, but after I go I feel great and wonder why I made such a fuss about leaving the house), and I feel like I'm a more productive parent. Also, our business runs more smoothly, because I am able to find the time to do all of those little things for the company that DH does not have the time to tend to (payroll, billing, etc.).

At some point, I hope to incorporate my artistic pursuits into the mix of organized chaos. I'm sure that this will happen because, until this week, I never thought it possible to reach the point I'm at now, with our home reasonably clean and it's inhabitants fairly content. Right now, though, I have breakfast to make. Thank G-d this life flows one day at a time.

Sunday Night and ZZZZZZ

Another weekend has drawn to a close and it's seems like Friday night had just arrived! I did end up going to synagogue on Friday night, and although our usual Rabbi was not present, a woman Rabbi was there and she did a fabulous job. I left with a feeling of peace, ready to enter into another weekend.

This morning we joined some friends at the beach where, each Sunday, there is an organic market where one can buy fresh vegetables and fruit. I'd never been before, but the couple we met shop there once a month or so (they live about 45 minutes north of us so it's a bit of a drive to make with two small children). I walked around for awhile checking out the produce and soaking up the wonderful scent of fresh, organic vegetables (it always seems to me that organic veggies have a stronger scent) before selecting a couple of tomatoes and some huge carrots. That was all I could manage to pick before the crowds moved in. I sometimes become very anxious when I'm in a crowd atmosphere and today was one of those sorts of days. I left the market with $5.00 plus change in veggies, which is okay since they tend to spoil quickly. I can always go to Whole Foods for organic food during the week (I wish one would be built closer to where we live-they seem to be building everything else).

Two hours past dinnertime, my little one is suddenly hungry again and so she is eating a snack with her Daddy. This means that bath time has been pushed forward a bit, but it also meant that I had a few minutes to bang away at the computer keyboard. That said, she should be just about finished with her cheese, and I need to go run her a nice warm bath and snuggle her into her jammies for storytime. I love motherhood, but even mommies need some downtime!!!!